Consolment
by Moonystruck
Summary: [On Hiatus] (SLASH! HarryDraco) Sirius is dead but he is speaking to Harry in his dreams and telling him to turn to unexpected places for consolment. Is it really Sirius and has this new person really changed or is it all an act...
1. Chapter 1

Harry was sitting in his bedroom at number 4 Privet Drive for the sixth day and he was reading over the letter he had just finished to send to the Order. He didn't really have much to say, seeing as he had written all five previous days that he been there since returning from Hogwarts.

He knew that he really didn't have to write as often as he had, Moody had at least three days, but he had nothing better to do. Which was terrible because he had so many terrible things to think about.

He could not know what was going on with Voldemort because the only contact he had with his world was through letters, and information could not be put in those for obvious reasons. But he understood this time and he knew that he would only have to be at the Dursley's for a week...

_Until Sirius's memorial service tomorrow. It is going to be so final. _

He had accepted that Sirius was dead, but he didn't know how he would react when he was around his friends again.

_What if I just break down? What will they think of me? No one will think I am strong enough to defeat Voldemort... Oh... And what about him... What will I have to do? Why did it have to be me? Why do I have to either kill or be killed? _

"URGH!" Harry shouted in frustration. He had been going around in circles like this every five minutes.

Harry looked around around for something to get his mind off things and remembered the letter he was about to send.

_Hello everyone! _

Well things are the same as yesterday, and the day before, and, well, the day before for that matter. The Dursleys are still avoiding me. I think know that they are absolutely terrified of Moody. It makes living here much easier. Well, I will see you all tomorrow. I think I might go raid the fridge now (ask Hermione), I would have never been able to do that before.

See you!  
Harry

"Good enough," Harry sighed. He sealed the letter, tied it to Hedwig's leg, and sent her off. "Well, let's go see what we can find to eat. Bloody hell, I have really got to stop talking to myself..."

So, Harry went down stairs to see what he could find to eat. As usual, there was only a few fruits and vegetables. Dudley was still on his diet and Aunt Petunia had scolded Harry when he brought home his sweets from the train.  
Harry smiled, _Yeah, she scolded me until I reminded her about the little threat from the Order. _

Harry ended up grabbing an apple and heading outside. He would go to the park and hang out until dark. He knew that no one would care, he had cleaned  
his bedroom and the bathroom.

As he walked he acted the part of silent observer. Watching everything very closely, desperately hoping to see some sign of a wizard.

_But then again, that could mean that there was something very wrong... _

Once again Harry could not believe that he was thinking about his problems. He had gone on this little walk to forget...

_But I can't forget about Voldemort and I don't want to forget Sirius... _

He had reached the park and walked over to the swings to sit down.

He sat for several minutes, concentrating on finishing his apple, and then tossed the core into the rubbish bin next to him.

He gazed off across the field to the benches at the edge of the park. There was someone sitting there.

_I have never seen her before. Her hair is beautiful, white blonde, wavy, and shoulder length. Wow... She's reading... I wonder what she is reading... Maybe I should go over and say hi... Yeah, I think I will... _

He got up and began the journey over to the girl. She seemed to have noticed that Harry was walking over. She had lowed the book, but did not turn to look at him.

_There is something familiar about her, but it's different, what ever it was... _

CRACK!

Harry gasped and jumped back. She had disapperated when Harry was about twenty feet away.

"I knew there was something!" Harry cried and looked around. There had to have been a muggle that had seen her. But the children playing a short distance away seemed to not have noticed.

_Who was that? I know I know her... Well, I don't know... Maybe not ... Maybe it was just wishful thinking. _

Harry didn't think too much about it. There was probably people following him again, but, again, he understood this time. Every since Dumbledore had explained everything he had been much more understanding.

He looked to where the sun was setting and decided he should go back to the house. He should at least try to get a good night's sleep. Even though he knew that he would worry about the memorial.

He was back in his room just as the street lights flicked on. He flopped on the bed, set his glasses on the bedside cabinet, and stared at the ceiling. Something was bothering him...

_Who was that? I know I don't know her. I would have remembered such a beautiful human being. She was absolutely radiant... but... I didn't even see her face... why did I feel... Veela! I bet she was at least part veela! She had to have been. I would never have just walked over to a girl like I did. Well, that makes sense... I think... She was familiar because I have known a veela... Yeah, that's it, yeah... _

And with that Harry slipped into a light sleep.

He was sitting on the swing in the again but this time Sirius was there.

"Why did I have to believe that you would have left Grimauld place, Sirius? If I would have trusted that you knew better then you never would have died..." Harry trailed off.

"It was not your fault, son."

"You've never called me that before," Harry said and looked up to Sirius with a tear in his eye.

"I didn't think it my place to, but know things are different," Sirius said and slightly chuckled, "Very different."

"Don't joke about that," Harry was silently crying now, tears streaming down his face. He reached over to hug Sirius, but he wouldn't hug him.

"I'm sorry, Harry, I can't comfort you now," Sirius said sadly. Then he pointed to the blonde sitting on the bench, "Go get your comfort there. I promise that this is where you will be happy. Trust me, Harry, you may be shocked but you have to trust me."

"Goodbye, Sirius."

"Goodbye, son. I love you, and I am watching out for you. Just remember to trust my advice."

Then Harry was all of a sudden sitting on the bench in the arms of the blonde. He felt so right sitting there. it was like the whole world was at peace when he was in this persons arms.

That was when he realized that the blonde was not a girl, it was a boy. His body had the same build as his own.

_He must be a Quidditch player. A seeker even... Wait I have felt this body before. During Quidditch, we fell on each other trying to get the snitch... Malfoy! _

He jerked away. It was Malfoy.

He woke with a start.

"Oh, my..."

_What was that! Malfoy? But... But... He was different... His face was soft and kind and... and loving? _

"Loving?" Harry said questioningly.

_Why would Malfoy look at me like that? Oh, just forget about it. It was just a dream... Wasn't it? It was different... I talked to Sirius though... _

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

Harry pounded the top of his alarm. He didn't want to get up. He didn't want to have to face this day. He didn't want to face how people would treat him. Like he would break if they were to say anything wrong.

"Get down here and make some breakfast, Boy!" Uncle Vernon yelled up the stairs.

"NO!" Harry yelled. He would be leaving in a few minutes and didn't care what the Dursleys did to him.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY T..." Uncle Vernon was cut off.

_Aunt Petunia must have stopped him. She _is _really scared. She would be though, she was the one who was so exposed to what determined wizards could do. _

Harry reluctantly got out of bed and went to the bathroom to take a shower.

_A cold one... _

He felt dirty for thinking about Malfoy the way he had.

As he stood in the shower his thoughts returned to the beginning of the dream, when he was speaking to Sirius.

_What did he mean when he said to trust his advice? He couldn't have really meant to go to Malfoy. He knew that Malfoy was a Death Eater. Why would Sirius send him to Draco? It was nice though. He made me feel good. I haven't felt good like that in a long time. He felt good too. His chest was firm and... _

What is happening to me!

He finished up quickly and got dressed. He couldn't believe that he was thinking things like that about a Malfoy.

_Not only a Malfoy but a _male _Malfoy... _

He stopped in his tracks.

_Does this mean I'm... I'm GAY! NO! I liked Cho, a lot! _

He didn't really feel much better with this thought but he continued down stairs and his deliberations turned to leaving. He had packed last night before writing his letter. So, he did have anything to do before they came to get me.

_I wonder who will tag along this time. They all seem to want to greet me every chance they get. _

He laughed out loud at this thought.

"What's so funny," Dudley spat at Harry as he went around the corner.

"Your face," Harry said sarcastically.

Dudley stuck his tongue out and pushed Harry into the wall as he passed him.

"Real mature, Muggle."

Dudley didn't hear him though, because there was suddenly several loud cracks in the living room. Then Aunt Petunia screamed shrilly and there was a lot of loud banging, that was Dudley running up the stairs.

Harry shot towards that room and run smack into someone.

"Hello, Harry."

"Hello, Tonks."

"I was just off to see if I could find a bite to eat before we went to the... umm... before we had to leave."

Harry had been right. They were going to treat him like a child. Well, he was going to make sure they knew he could deal with this just as good as anyone.

"Yeah, I haven't eaten anything. The kitchen is this way," Harry said. "When are we going to the funeral?"

"Oh... We are going straight there from here. We have about ten minutes before we leave. Moody, Lupin, Mr. Weasley, Bill, and Charley are in there talking to your Aunt and Uncle, but they weren't to keen on it from what I saw."

A slight smile appeared on Harry's face. He could just imagine them cowering in the corner. "Yeah, lets hurry so I can get in there and see that."

They walked to the kitchen and each got a banana.

"That should hold us off. Mrs. Weasley is making a big feast for after the funeral."

"Okay," Harry said firmly. He did not want it to show that he had felt a pang inside when she said that.

They walked back to where everyone was and Harry saw his welcome party standing awkwardly in the middle of the room with the Dursleys against the wall. Vernon was standing in front of Petunia and Dudley was standing stupidly somewhat off to the side. He must have come down from his room when he heard movement in the kitchen.

"Well, hello there Harry," Mr. Weasley said in a very forced-cheerful voice when Harry walked in.

"How have you been holding up?" Lupin moved across the room and pulled Harry into a fatherly hug.

"Just holding," Harry said and Lupin hugged him tighter.

"Me too," he replied as tears began to roll down his face.

Harry could hear Tonks sniffle to his left. He felt very close to Sirius as Lupin hugged him. Just like he had felt close to his father when he was with Sirius. He didn't really want to let go and show everyone his own tears but he had to. The room was becoming very tense.

"What... what is the problem with you lot?" Vernon asked apprehensively.

"Well," Moody growled, "If you must know, we have lost someone very close to us."

"I didn't know your kind cared when someone kicked the bucket," Vernon said. He thought he was being funny.

"DON'T YOU EVER SAY ANYTHING LIKE THAT AGAIN!" Harry screamed.

"Harry," Lupin said soothingly, "Just ignore him. He is an ignorant prick!" Lupin had spat the last part at Vernon.

"Umm... I think we should go..." Mr. Weasley said.

"Yeah," Moody said as he pulled out an old candle jar with a bit of wax in the bottom, "Harry grab on. Everyone else is going to Apparate there."

Just after Harry touched the jar he felt that awful yank behind his navel. He swirled around for a bit, hit the gound, and, amazingly didn't fall.

_Wow, I must be getting used to that. Finally... _

He looked up at the church, Moody placed a hand on his shoulder, and they walked in.


	2. Chapter 2

Ok... So now im going to explain a little bit about this story...

I began writing it a long time ago and the other day i want back to reread it and thought it had potential, so I posted it. I'm not really sure where it's going but for some reason I really like these two chaps.

Other stuff that wasn't in the first chap...

Disclaimer: Characters aren't mine...

Warning: Slash... If you haven't figured that out by now well... I'm sorry for you. Don't likie, Don't readie!

* * *

Harry felt as if he couldn't breath the whole time he had been sitting in the church. He was now standing outside as everyone was giving him their condolences.

"Hi, Harry, Remus," Hermione said as she walked up and gave them each a hug. Her face was just as tear stained as his and Remus's. Harry recognized her parents, who were standing behind her. They looked very nervous.

"Hi, Hermione. How are you?" Harry said softly. He found it difficult to speak.

"Oh, Harry, I'm okay," she said and tears began to roll down her cheeks again.

Harry pulled her into another hug and she sobbed into his shoulder for a few minutes.

Then when she finally let go she simply said, "I'll see you at the house," and walked away.

"Mr. Potter!" someone said from across the crowd.

Remus moaned next to Harry. "Reporter," he explained.

"So, Mr. Potter, you were close to Mr. Black?" the reported said. He was wearing dark gray robes with the Daily Prophet logo.

"He was his Godfather. Now leave us alone." Remus said as calmly as he could.

"And you are?" the reporter asked.

"I was Sirius's hu... umm... best friend, and now I am legally Harry's Godfather."

Harry hadn't known this but he didn't want to make a big deal in front of the reporter.

_They would have a field day with me not knowing anything. _

"Really!" asked the man, intrigued.

"Really," said Remus and ushered Harry away.

"How are you my Godfather now?"

"Umm... Well, Sirius and I were... umm... we had a certain legal tie..." Remus trailed off.

Harry didn't think to question and Remus was glad. He didn't want anyone to know the extent of his relationship with Sirius. But, he also knew that he would have to tell Harry one day. _Probably sooner than later. _He sighed.

Harry saw the Weasleys and walked over to them. He wanted to see Ron.

_A familiar face will be nice. Who are all these people? They don't have the right to be here. They all thought he was a murderer for all those years and now they act like he was their best friend. _

"Hey, Ron," Harry whispered in Ron's ear, not wanting to announce himself.

"Hi, Harry. How are ya, Mate?" Ron said as he gave him a brotherly hug.

"Okay," Harry shrugged.

"Well, I promise everything will be okay," Mrs. Weasley said in a motherly tone.

"I'll see you all at the house," said Harry and walked away.

"Would you like to leave?" Remus asked.

"You read my mind."

They went to find Moody to get the portkey and were at Grimmauld Place before anyone else.

"Is my stuff in my room?" Harry asked.

Remus nodded as he hung his cloak on the stand by the door.

"I'm going to go change," Harry said.

"Yeah, me too. Then I'll be in the study," Remus said to Harry's as they began to go upstairs.

Harry walked into the room that he and Ron shared. The room was very familiar by now. With it's two four-poster beds and, of course, the frame that Phineas Nigellus was supposed be in. He changed out of his dress robes, and laid down on the bed to think.

The funeral had helped him. The deep cut left by Sirius's death was still very bad, but he felt like he could let it begin to heal now.

Then his thoughts turned...

_I should ask someone about that dream. It was not a real dream. I have had enough fake dreams to know the difference after all..._

He snorted in indignation.

_I think Hermione would be the best bet. She won't make a big deal out of to everyone. Yeah, that will be good. Now, Remus... I wonder what kind of legal tie they had. He started acting really weird after that reporter asked who he was. _

He frowned and got up to go downstairs and interrogate Remus.

He walked into the study and found Remus curled up in a squashy love seat. He was looking at photo album and Harry could see tears shimmering on his cheeks in the firelight. Harry decided that he shouldn't disturb him, but he must have heard him because he looked up from the album.

"Come here, Harry," Remus said and patted the seat next to him.

Harry walked over and looked at the book. It had enchanted pictures of the Marauders. Then Harry noticed that they were all in dress robes and there were decorations in the background.

"Who's wedding is that?" Harry asked. He knew it wasn't his parents' wedding, he had seen the pictures from that. These were different.

"Mine," Remus said simply.

It took a second to register.

"What? I didn't know you were married," Harry said.

"Yeah," Remus said and held up his left hand. There was a gold band on his ring finger.

Harry couldn't believe he had never seen it before. He opened his mouth to ask but Remus answered before he had a chance.

"I don't usually were it. No one knew that we were married," Remus paused as he twisted the ring around his finger. "I miss him so much. I thought I had gotten him back. He was gone for so long. Then there was so much to do when he got out. We never really got to spend very much time together. I didn't even get to tell him how much I missed him, how much I loved him."

Harry couldn't believe his ears, or his eyes. The Remus and Sirius in one of the pictures had just kissed.

"But..." Harry sputtered then said the first thing that came to mind, "Why... why didn't you tell anyone?"

"We didn't think it was appropriate to announce a gay marriage at the time. You see, it would have been another reason for Voldemort to hate us. We were already near the top of his most wanted list. Then Sirius went to Azkaban. I couldn't deal with people thinking the things they did about him. So, I didn't tell anyone. They wouldn't be able to ridicule me more than they already do."

Harry sat in silence. He was in shock and didn't know what to say.

"I know this must be very hard," Remus began, "When we told James he wouldn't talk to us for several months. I guess Lily finally convinced him to accept it, because he just came up to us one day told us that he was sorry for being such a prick. That was exactly what he said too."

Remus chuckled at the memory then continued.

"Well, now you know. Sirius wanted to tell you himself. He felt bad for keeping it from you for so long, but I told him not to tell you yet. I didn't want you to have to deal with that until the war was over. Now, though, I realize that we should have told you from the beginning," He paused to look at Harry's blank expression. "I was technically your Godfather all along. That is why I took you under my wing when I taught."

"I never would have guessed," said Harry suddenly.

Remus smiled, "You would have if you would have had the chance."

"Who knows?"

"Well, no one, except you," Remus said. "But... I was going to tell everyone today, at dinner, or... I was going to try at least. If I don't you can tell who ever you want. I want it to be known now. Now, that... that it's too late."

Tears began to roll down his face again, and Harry hugged him.

"Thank you, Harry."

"For what?"

"For supporting me."

"Well..." Harry began but at that second there were several loud pops in the enterance hall.

Remus sighed once again and said, "We'll have to finish this later, Harry. I'm sorry. Here goes nothing."

They got up and walked out of the room to see the Weasleys.


End file.
